4 Weeks Baby, 4 Weeks!!

I stole the title from a line on the TV show Friends. You can judge me if you want for knowing the show so well that I can quote the line while my DVDs are in a different state. It's okay, I can handle it. The line happens when Monica and Chandler are counting down to their wedding. Monica comes out of the bedroom in the morning and screams, "4 weeks baby, 4 weeks!" And Chandler says, "And you get louder every week."

I understand Monica's sentiments. 4 weeks left until I am finished with CPE. I honestly don't know if I have ever been happier that something will end soon. And trust me, compared to 11 weeks, 4 is nothing. Nothing.

After my internship this year I was fairly devastated. In fact, I'm still not sure if I am over that. When I think of Decorah, my heart sort of aches. CPE, however, is a different sort of animal. I have definitely learned as much about myself in the last 7 weeks as I did during my internship, mostly because of intensity. So CPE has been worthwhile, honest. I just keep thinking - in 4 weeks I will be in Chicago, and my husband and I will only live in 2 states, not 3. And I will get to see my mom, my dad, my brother, my grandparents, my mother-in-law, my husband's family, I will get to go sailing....and sleep....and not worry so much about people dying.

It is interesting that I am so thankful for something that has overall been so exceedingly painful. Suffering and walking in the wilderness are biblical themes that have become relevant in my life during the last few years, but never before. I am still learning what it means to be a child of God, questioning everything, feel lost, but staying true to the one who created you. Faith is such a journey. And I am somewhere on the journey...I'm not exactly sure where, but at least I'm walking, right?