Funny Children Stories

I work at a Head Start preschool. The children there are 4 and 5 years old. Although I work with just one child specifically, I end up being involved in everything for all the kids because I am there. There are 20 kids in the classroom and they have said some funny things lately.


We traveled to visit the kindergarten this week and played at the 'big playground'. There were tire swings. While I was pushing some kids on the tire swings a child says, "Alaina, you are the bestest tire swing pusher. You should be a professional tire swing pusher. You rock."


At lunch: "I can't eat vegetables." My response was, "why is that, A?" His response: "They will kill me. I'm telling you, Alaina, I'll die if I eat those tomatoes." Me: "Have you ever tried tomatoes?" Him: "Didn't you hear me Alaina? I will die if I eat them. Are your ears working?"


During classroom exploration time there were lots of children running, which is not allowed. I said, "Please put your walking feet on." Response of C: "Alaina, I tried to find my walking feet but they are missing. I have looked everywhere."


At lunch: "Are those green alien heads?" "No, they are brussel sprouts." Child from the next table yells out "Isn't that the same thing?"


We sang the ABC song. A young girl looked up at me and said, "Do you think I will ever get the part after 'L'?"


Me: "Please write your name on the thank you poster." H: "I can't write my name." Me: "You just wrote your name on your drawing." H: "I changed my name and I don't know how to spell The Incredible Hulk. That's who I am now."


Child: "Check out my light saber, Alaina. See? It has 2 red sides!" Me: "Oh, a 2 sided light saber? Are you a bad guy?" Child: "Have you seen Star Wars?" Me: "Yes." Child: "Wow. You are so cool. My mom won't watch it. You should talk to her about it."


"Alaina, please zip up my coat." "Well, H, you are 5. 5 year olds can usually zip their own coats. Why don't you try?" "Alaina, just because I am 5 doesn't mean I know science."


And, the best one of all, after picking up litter: "Why are people so gross throwing their trash on the ground?" I responded with "I don't know". The child then says "Those people should go to jail. But maybe not. My dad litters and I don't want him to go to jail. Alaina don't tell the police my dad litters! I'll talk to him about it, I promise. Could I be his lawyer?"